Now we heal

Anyone who has followed us on our journey for Jake probably already knows the outcome but for those who may not , Jake was in an accident last summer that took his life and we have been going through the court system to seek justice for our boy . The driver tried to claim that Jake was driving and after a long investigation the truth was discovered and the driver was then charged with multiple charges including a few felonies . He asked for a plea and accepted what was offered . We had waited longer than 8 months for the day to learn the fate of the man that stole a huge part of our world and finally the  day had come .  Surrounded by our army of support we walked into that court room unintimidated and sat strong as the judge listened to our letters explaining our emotions and opinions on a sentence . We were there for Jake and hoping for a punishment we felt worthy , yet at the same time the drivers mother sat in the back of the courtroom listening to our sniffles and watched us wipe our tears as she waited for the fate of her son that was  still setting right in front of her .  There we were , 2 mothers awaiting 2 different outcomes and I can say for myself it felt like a lifetime and when the judge finally announced the punishment I felt myself finally exhale , not because I was thrilled with the outcome but because it was finally over .  The judge said it best when he said “There are no winners here today ” . Nothing can bring Jake back to us but at least we can now feel like a punishment was given and he will have to give up at least a short time of his life for what he has done  . I have been so obsessed with the court process and the months of learning the lingo and having to face it head on that I now am left standing wondering what to do next . I don’t have the distraction anymore to keep me busy in between court dates so now I am free to allow myself to take the  time to heal and process how different our lives now are . We have all of our memories that noone can take and we are a strong unit together so when one of us is weak the rest of us are there to hold it together and that is the most important thing to me right now .  My advice to anyone going through something similar would be to be patient with your self and lean on the ones around you willing to hold you up .To others  I am just a normal mother that lost her son ,but to me I am the one whos life has been changed forever and will live  without Jake , but I will make him proud and live the way he would want me too . Full of laughs and smiles and never regretting . If there is  one thing Jake tought me was that life isn’t so serious all of the time and just let go and enjoy it !!  I hope everyone has a great day and try to make at least one person smile even if it is yourself .

#143

Jakes Mom